1. Alice Tuan, Old Cunt, will die soon, so patronize her a little before her inevitable death.
2. Soo-Jin Lee, Green Cunt, will maybe actually have an opinion to share with us. I don't know.
3. Young Cunt, Kristina Wong's ego has actually been said to have grown larger than cancerous balls. Take a look!
4. Katie Pearl will allow the lucky to touch her Obie Award.
5. Inevitable race riots!
6. Free all you can drink wine!
7. The list of banned titles of unwritten Asian American plays from the future Asian American Theater Canon (Cannon) is revealed!
8. It's only $9 you cheap ass cheap asses!
9. Four careers that were already in the shit hole explode into diarrhea!
10. Free all you can drink wine!
